Part V
Ph Watches TV

Chapter 15:   Papercliptologisarians

      After this little show, Ph watched another short show, about a boy and his paper clip collection, because Ph likes paper clips. This is how the show went:
      Once upon a day, there was a boy who had the biggest paper clip collection in the world. Then a minute later, he had the smallest paper clip collection in the world, because he lost it. You may think that the boy thought it was going to be the end of the world, but he didn't. He thought it was going to be the end of the universe! His paper clips were the most important things in his lifeless life. He had every kind of paper clip there ever was. He had everything from rainbow colored ones, to ones shaped like bell bottom pants with rips in the knees. When the boy grew up, he was going to be a papercliptologisarian. A papercliptologisarian is a person who studies paper clips in small laboratories that only have one light bulb, and no pencil sharpeners. There has only been one papercliptologisarian in the whole world, and he died ten dog years ago when he accidentally ate a Mickey Mouse paper clip that had fallen into his tuna fish sandwich. This probably happened because the tuna fish wasn't 100% Dolphin free, and we all know that paper clips love animals.
      It was a miracle! Two days later, the boy found his paper clip box (with all of his paper clips) in his hand! Don't you hate it when you're looking for a pen or something, and you forget that it is right in your left hand?
      Then there was only one life threatening problem. He was still missing he super sharp, #435 paper clip. This was the one that he always used to poke holes in the eyes of the players in his baseball card collection. He was very mad, even though he had lost his baseball card collection in his left shirt pocket, an eon ago.
      What a surprise! The next day he found his super sharp #435 paper clip in his other hand. Now he could go back to his regular monotonous life. In case you were wondering, the boy's name was Paye Perr Clihpz.
      Ph didn't have much to say about this show, because he fell asleep at the beginning of it. Luckily he didn't get hurt when he fell this time, because that wouldn't be peachy.

Always check your tuna fish for paper clips!

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Last Updated on January 31st, 1999
©1993-1999 B. Wood Bailey, Jr.