THE FRIGHTENING VISUAL TRUTH-
203 Halloween Party
Disclaimer #34987- The images below contain comments which are not suitable for small children, pets, and Tino. No, not DINO from The Flinstones...Tino. And if you have a fear of Cher, it is recommended that you call for medical assistance now before venturing any further into the vortex of this site. By scrolling down, you agree to give your soul to Satan to feed all his demon babies. Happy Halloween! All comments were written in good humor, of course, so if you can't laugh at yourself or others, you need to visit a proctologist ASAP because there is something seriously stuck up your @$$. And now, before Britney Spears starts doing Dennis Rodman, I present to you THE IMAGES.
Oh crap...my picture's first. All right, well, I dressed up as Juliette, but that dress sorta ended up on the floor sometime in the middle of the night. I mean, oh crap, I wasn't supposed to say that. Oh crap, I certainly shouldn't have said it was illegal. Hmm..wait, I didn't say it was illegal. Ummmmmm....look over there!
Why do I look so happy here? I mean, I didn't have any cheesecake the whole night. No air hockey tournaments. And this was a few hours before the sexage so... Oh, now I know why. The 203 House Mouse climbed under my dress and up my legs. Mmm, I love warm fuzzy things. Take it how you will! Mwahahahahaha! HA! heh...ehhh...
Yo. Peace. These wonderful expressions used to belong to the pot-smoking hippies way back in 1969 before "bling-bling" rappers stole it and used it as their own. Damn P. Diddy and his posse! Anyway, here's Mike as the lovable pot-smoking hippie. But I think he looks more like a porn director in this picture. DOESN'T HE?! All scrungy like that?! Yeah, he's got the total flavor-saver thing going on...very pimpish with the peace necklace which sorta looks like spread legs being penetrated. You'll never look at a peace sign the same way ever again!
Ahhh, Mike's being attacked by cobwebs!! I don't think giving the peace sign will save you from the black widow who spun that web. I mean, haven't you seen Jeff? The last time he went down to the basement to "store" his whatchamajiggits, he was attacked by the one and only, BLACK WIDOW SPIDER. He was lucky to have survived and is no longer a virgin, but unfortunately, his head continually pops off at the worst moments. HIS REAL HEAD YOU SICKOS. Yes, the one attached by a neck... A short neck. Ugh, this is just getting worse and worse. Get your head out of the gutter. Not that head, the other head. Wow, how long is this going to go on.....LOL!
One drink in and already she's trashed! Oh yes, try to smile and give us all the innocent look, but that's EVERCLEAR in that cup and I don't mean the band from California! Marion did a time warp like Mike did...and went back into the 60s. She thinks flavor-savers are kewl and wishes Brendan grew his back. On further inspection of this picture, I think we should all play the Where's Douglas game...go find him. Doo doo doo doo doo, yeahhh there he is. Now, drink 3 shots of Everclear and try again :-D
Eric wins 2nd Place on my list of best costumes. El Presidente Fidel Castro!! We should send this picture over to the real Castro in Cuba. Caption, "Hippies and Cuba...together, we can make a difference!" I love how guys always have their hands on their crotches. Or maybe it's just when I'm around. Trying to keep it down, eh, boys?! Girls with cameras are just so sexy...girls getting naked in front of cameras? Even sexier!
"Owwie, Eric, no teeth please!" ---BGD
Don't worry folks, that's not Brendan's "thing" protruding. I looked deep and hard (geez, you people are BAD!) and discovered it was simply his thigh. So we can all take a deep breath like Marion does after sex and thank god it's over. (oooh!)
Since Doug went to another party, the hallway remained unswept, nobody got stabbed with a pointy sword, and (Doug, Dylan, take this lightly! JOKE JOKE! Supposed to be HA-HA funny!!) there was no interesting drunk intellectual fighting between him and Dylan. Damn Doug, we totally missed you! BTW- Is this not the face of PURE EVIL?
Craig in black pleather! Damn, it is the apocalypse as we know it! And Craig just "happens" to have this in his closet? Hmm, wonder what else is in his closet other than that pleather outfit. You know Craig's gone to the Erogenous Zone and Zipperheads and CK on South Street and has like a full out dungeon in his closet full of whips, chains, and flavored petroleum jellies! Too bad it's only Doug's cats that have expereinced Craig's closet. (uhhhh)
Mascot of the Halloween Party: FU!
Derek wasn't kidding when he said he had one drink and then he was drunk. Remember- never eat JUST A BUTTERFINGER before drinking! Derek supposedly dressed up as an "Australian." Now if only he rode a kangaroo around the house, that would've been awesome!
OMIGOD, IT'S BGD as CHER!!! This is the safest picture I have of him so beware! But if you like seeing @$$ like I do, you'll love the rest of the pictures!
Applause to Dave for having the guts to wear the outfit and make sure it's perfect right down to the last detail! He wins 1st place for costume design! Congrats, man! You are seriously awesome! Now do a little victory shimmie!
Though you can't see it all that well in this picture, Hillary went as the Winged Black Goth. She thought we'd all laugh, but that wasn't the case. We just stared. Now, if you had to choose between staring at Hillary or Dave, that's a pretty close call. One has frontal cleavage, one has back cleavage. It's a good toss up!
Dave helps Silent Bob keep it down! LOL! Sorry Jim, I just had to! Jim wins a 3rd place spot not only because he really friggin looks like Silent Bob, but also because he acted the part! Way to go, man! We're sort of glad Dave didn't role play Cher. Can you imagine him dancing around singing "If I Could Turn Back Time..."?? Yeah, we were spared. Now let's all have a beer and forget this thought ever entered our heads.
DON'T KILL ME, DAVE!!! Ahhhh!! I think this picture is the scariest picture of the night by far! I think the camera got a few sips of my apple cider and everclear. It had alcohol/beer glasses for much of the night as you'll see soon enough.
Hugh Hefner and one of his Playboy Bunnies...fabulously sexy! You can tell Brendan has other motives for the night, though, because he's not the one drinking. Look at that smile. It's a total evil Hefner smile, pipe and all. (BGD- "Owwie, no teeth, Brendan!")
Ryan dressed up as a dog for Halloween. Who believes he should have dressed up as a Weasel? Then you've got the Designated Driver (drinking. Classic. We caught you.) with the French Maid. She must've been cold. Then there's Kat. All concur that Kat is "nice" and perhaps even "awesome." Then you've got Death with the raven. Anyone know who this kid is? Cuz I saw him once and then he disappeared. Did El Presidente scare him away?
Brendan believed dressing up as a lawyer was scary enough. I think I speak for everyone when I say, "We concur."
AHHHHH!! The Playboy Bunny had some strange disease and bit Hugh Hefner! Watch the tranformation!
Hugh, I think you didn't get your bunny drunk. I think your bunny got you drunk.
Proof that Playboy is truly evil in every way. A red demonic light glows on them. (Seriously, folks, I have no idea what that red glow is....but I do believe Satan played a part in it!).
Satan abused all our bodies last night. I believe it was due to the apple cider/jungle juice simply because Brendan made it. Notice how there's always something FRUITY about all of Brendan's alcoholic beverages? LOL! "No beer and no TV make French Maid go something something." GO CRAZY? DON'T MIND IF I DO?! BLAWAWALLALWALWA!
"Hey you, over there with the camera. Omigod, you are pointing it at me. Crap. And I've got a French Maid in a really short skirt on my lap. Hand...must...cover...crotchal...area...." French Maid says, "Mmm, I like fishnets!"
Their tongue size makes up for their inadequacies elsewhere! Lick him, Mike, lick him!! Ooooooh baybee!!
Well, we had a small shortage of real women at the party, but we had plenty of tranvestites! And the blonde one has really nice boobs. SQUEEZE!!!
The Lawyer and the Transvestites...Coming Soon To Theatres Near YOU!
A POPPLE!! I don't really wanna know w hat he does inside his "bubble," but it reminds me of that skit on SNL where the guy takes Yoga for 10 years to give himself a BJ. I think Popples are excellent at self-oralization. Yeah, and the guy who dressed up as Popple, he knows all about self-oralization, too. If you become good friends with him, maybe he'll teach you!
El Presidente in his secret lair!! Mwahahahaha! Brawwwwrrrr!!! He shall eat you and your babies!!
It's the Mare!!! Before beer pong!!! Though as you can see, the camera now has some serious beer goggles on (aka: Mike's pocket lint). We danced around some because she and I are kewl like that. Everyone who didn't dance, you suck. We actually had a decent floor to dance on and everything and Adio was doing his best, though I still think a techno remix of Tool or APC would've been awesome, but anyway...
OMIGOD. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I have never gotten so much pleasure out of one picture in my entire life! Tino's breasts were great...one was harder than the other. Oh yeah! He let me squeeze em! He's wearing a LOSER shirt (Poor Sam Katz), Mardi Gras beads (because Tino flashed BGD!), and the sombrero. I think the lipstick should be permanent...and the open mouth like he's ready to eat a hotdog! Mmm, hotdogs! Oh Tino, this picture goes down in history as one of my FINEST! We could blow it up to 8x10!! Omigod...this picture is SOOO CLASSIC!! Ok, more story behind the Tino-man. I don't know how much he had to drink, but when he drinks, he starts walking like a woman! Hahahahahaha! Aww man, I'm just joshin' with ya Tino. You're awesome!
Ok, who peed on the floor? Dylan? Mike? Derek???? So, this is where the damage was done...beer pong. Tino is a pro at beer pong. Marion is a pro at beer pong. Dylan is a pro at beer pong. And Derek is a pro at beer pong. A bunch of pros playing beer pong = a bunch of pros drunk off their ass within hours. Now the question is, who can hold their own...and I think we all know the answer to that. ME!
Marion and Tino think they can hold their own. Ask them what went on at this party in detail. Bet they can only tell you what they HEARD happened!
Sexy sexy! Mare's giving me the eyes...camera with beer goggles, Marion with beer goggles....sounds like a new sitcom on CBS to me!
Ok, so that's it...comments suck this time....oh well...I'll photograph more and make better image sites soon enough! Much loves to all!