Mr. Abrams is Easily Irritated

Source: "Preacher" #59 Garth Ennis, Steve Dillon, John McRae, creators
(8/11/02)

I expect you to be awake and alive in class.

I expect you to do all the reading-- and think about it.

I expect you not to take everything I say as holy writ. If you don't understand something or think I'm wrong, it's your job to ask questions.

If you're shy, get over it. Being polite and waiting your turn are not show business survival traits.

Why You Should Avoid Spelling & Syntax Mistakes

It doesn't matter how good your ideas are if you can't spell them. Sloppiness in spelling or boneheaded syntax mistakes are the mark of an amateur, and this is a course about being a professional. Therefore, any assignment will be knocked down by a full letter grade for any of the following:

1) Any mistake that indicates that you didn't use your spellchecker. Obviously, proper names and deliberately creative spelling in dialogue ("gonna" or "cain't", for example) won't count.

2) Using the wrong homonym in any of these cases:

3) Apostrophe mistakes. They drive me crazy.

It doesn't matter what you do to avoid these mistakes-- buy a copy of Elements of Style (Strunk & White) or a different style guide, go to the Writing Center, buddy up with somebody else in the class, get Mom to read it, or check out Paul Brians' terrific "Common Errors" web site-- whatever works for you. But do it, or else.

It should not be part of this class to teach you stuff you should have learned in grade school. If you've managed to get this far in your education without learning these things, you haven't been doing yourself any favors. This is your only warning.