Kick Those Dogs Back

Can you smell your feet right now? I know that after a long day, my dogs are kickin.’ But it isn’t like I haven’t tried to avoid the problem. I have an above average interest in the subject.

Years ago, I used to have a routine. Every morning at work while chit chatting over coffee with my co-workers, I would sit there and powder my shoes as if I were flouring a baking pan. Everyone knew the drill and it was no big deal.

Then I read somewhere that if you tie up kitty litter in knee high stockings and put it in your shoes at night, it absorbs the moisture and removes odor. It was my mission to share this awesome idea with everyone in the office. I though everybody was as thrilled as I was to find this out. It always amazes me how some people would prefer to humor you than tell you what they really think. But I digress . . .

A few years after I had left the company, I was visiting a friend who had recently stopped working there. As I was casually going through the photo album our former staff had made for her as a going away present, I came across a page that simply said, "Did you know that if you put kitty litter in knee high stockings and put it in your shoes, they won’t smell?" Hmm, that sounds familiar I thought to myself. Where did I hear that before? So I turned the page. Sure enough, there was a 8" x 10" photo of me. Gosh, what a legacy to leave behind.

Fast forward about five years. I am at work and realize that my tape dispenser is leaking sand all over my desk and floor. It is a fine time to realize that the manufacturer uses sand to weigh the thing down. I find a new tape dispenser, do my best to clean up the mess, and get back to work.

Later that day, a co-worker stops by. Somehow we end up discussing my obsession with smelly feet and the kitty litter story. I finish up the story by telling her that "I feel much better now and I am not like that anymore."

She starts chuckling and says, "Oh really? Then that’s not kitty litter on the floor?" I look down and try to tell her about the broken tape dispenser. She didn’t believe me.

After all that you probably want to know if it really works. I don’t remember. I just remember that I always had sandy grains in my shoes. No wonder I could not get a date to save my life. Seems kind of gross when I think about it. But in the meantime, here are some of the things that I have discovered along the way:

Wear "leather upper" shoes 

Keep feet dry.  

Wearing pantyhose with an adequate blend of spandex and nylon. You will notice a difference with a higher percentage of spandex. 

Avoid wearing the same shoes two days in a row. Or try giving your shoes at least a 12 hour break. 

Using sneakers for their purpose. For example, don’t mix your "fashion" sneakers with the ones you just used to play b-ball with the guys. Using the same sneaks for sports and fashion is just plain nasty. 

Extend the life of your shoes; try foam shoe pads. 

Experiment with powders and sprays.

Avoid going barefoot.  I am all about freedom and carelessness.  However,  the less jazz that gets on your foot, the easier they are to keep clean.  Not to mention the dirt you bring to your sheets at night.  Does that give you something to think about?

Tea tree oil is also a great antiseptic cleaner for your feet. This stuff is also good for zits and smells like paint but it really works.

Using powder that smells like vomit. (Yep, happened to me.)

What I Know About BAD Feet Habits

Don't wear "man made" leather. 

Don't let feet stay sweaty. 

"No one cares about foot odor as much as you. You must have a problem."—Honest friend.

"My feet don’t smell."—Overly confident, yet naïve friend.

Nordstrom has the best trouser socks."—K.O. of Portland, Oregon.